"Thugging it out in silence" by PQHAÜS (Acrylic on canvas / 24x24 inches / 2024) I used to tell myself to "thug it out," no matter how close I came to breaking under the weight of the chaos life threw my way. I knew if I didn’t toughen up, I’d slip back into that dark psychological pit I had spent years clawing my way out of. And somehow, it always worked. I’d close my eyes, breathe in the silence, and imagine myself as an unstoppable force—a bulletproof bulldozer plowing th

"Nosedive" by PQHAÜS (Acrylic on canvas / 16x20 inches / 2024 During my teenage years, in the midst of my struggle with depression, my counselor suggested physical exercise as a means to combat my overwhelming thoughts. I chose swimming, specifically nosediving. Whenever I felt my mind on the verge of unraveling with uncontrollable thoughts, I would instinctively nosedive into the pool, temporarily escaping the harsh reality of my life. The immediate euphoria of submerging my

"But sometimes loving isn’t about making something work, but rather realizing it isn’t meant to" by PQHAÜS (Acrylic on canvas / 24x24 inches / 2024 Love is often portrayed as a force that can conquer all, but sometimes, the hardest and most necessary form of love is the one that lets go. In life, we may encounter relationships that, despite intense feelings and genuine affection, just aren’t meant to last. We may find ourselves holding on to these connections even when they c

"31 years old" by PQHAÜS (Acrylic on canvas / 24x30 inches / 2024 There will be a moment when you realize you're 31, though just yesterday you were 21. You won't be able to understand how a decade slipped by and your life became a series of befores and afters. Youth will gradually fade, and while nothing may truly change, everything will seem different when you look back at old photographs you took. Hanging out with your best friends slowly turns into a rare reunion as they

In the quiet moments of despair, when the weight of existence feels too much, a voice from within sometimes speaks, saying, “Please don’t do it.” This voice is small yet profoundly powerful, resonating with a simple, earnest hope. It is the inner child, the younger version of ourselves, asking the older, more burdened self to hold on—to remember a time when life was less complicated, more magical, and full of wonder. This voice is a reminder of who we once were, and what we h

"0 Support, 100 Congratulations" by PQHAÜS" (Acrylic on canvas / 24x24 / 2024) I passed my hardest moments alone while everyone believed I was fine. My knees bled every time I rose from a fall. My body began to lose all sense, yet not a single person was in sight to lend their shoulder. No one looked me in the eye and asked if I was okay. The world seemed like a playground, and my life was an abandoned construction zone, a neglected dump glanced at by passersby… This painting